putting my feet up

I've been on crutches for 2 weeks now. A silly misstep off the stoep, twisted ankle, pain, strap, bruising, immobility.
It's all really rather silly, but not without benefits.

I have to keep my foot up. I can't drive, or carry anything substantial, or tidy up much, or cook anything too complicated.
I have to sit down as much as possible. I have to read stories rather than play wild games. I have to write, rather than do errands.
I know you're all hating me a little bit, and that's ok.

But the main unexpected and welcome result is how independent my children are getting. I was just wondering around Christmas time whether I'd fallen into that classic loving parent trap of doing too much for my girls.
You know when it's just easier to do it yourself? When it's less messy to fill juice bottles without insisting they do it themselves, when it's less argumentative to put away their washing rather than get into a number about 'not being the servant'?

But now ... I just can't. And ergo, they just have to and, surprise surprise, they're ok with that. Crutches are undeniable, my disability is plain to see.
Need a clean t-shirt from upstairs? Off you go.
Need a snack? You know where the cupboard is.
Need something from a high-up cupboard? Get your sister to help you or wait until Dad gets home.
Sorry.

4 and 7 this year. They're getting more independent all the time and this little boost, early on in the year, is not a bad thing at all.
At R25/week rental from the pharmacy, I may just keep these crutches around for a bit after I'm done using them - cheap at the price for the lessons we're all learning.

And lest you think I'm being bone idle, the little embroidery above. As I said, there's definite benefits.

I'll be the one in the concrete shoes

Now hear this. I hate the Two Oceans Aquarium.

1. It's over-priced.
I get that it costs a lot to run but so does the World of Birds and look how much 'cheeper' that is. And with so, so much more on offer.
The Aquarium's tickets are over-priced and so is everything else for sale there. It's a tourist trap, and local or international, we're all being ripped off.

2. It's boring.
Barring a few new fish and the occasional re-arrangement, nothing much has changed there since I first went 4 years ago.
Even the puppet shows operate off a handful of scripts which they rotate haphazardly.
This morning Friday said disparagingly, 'The Nemo tank is boring'. Gasp!

3. It's demographically depressing.
Nothing makes one feel like a white middle-class mother of two like a trip to the Aquarium.

4. It's over-stimulating to them, and severely under-stimulating to me.
They barrel in there full of expectations, I drag behind full of good intentions, chanting 'This will be fun. This will be fun. This will be fun.'
20 minutes later we're all in the same emotional space. Tired, irritated, needing to pee.

5. It has toads.

I succumbed to their pleas and took them to the Aquarium today. It was the first time in about 6 months and as Neptune is my witness it'll be the last for a long, long time.

I'd rather sleep with the fishes than pay exorbitant amounts of money to dash past them chasing my own kids and tripping over everyone else's.

you know, THAT girl

The one who just can't say No. That's me.

Not about stuff like begging for sweets in the supermarket, or wanting one more cupcake, or Happy Feet for the brazillionth time that week - oh no, I'm cold as ice on that stuff, doling out No's with a firm, decided (and sometimes even smug) tone. Holding my resolve in the face of tears and entreaties and sticky-outy bottom lips.

But it's the requests to play which I struggle with. Being begged to read one more book, getting unwittingly cast as the mother/baby/monster/etc in one of the endless imaginary games, being asked to review the anatomical legitimacy of a play-dough snake.
Often it's just my presence that's required.
'Please Mum can you sit with me?' (while she happily builds a puzzle alone)
'Gnh Gnh GNH!!!' (as I try to sidle out the playroom)

I feel a huge amount of guilt turning these requests down. I feel like denying them the presence and attention of their mother is a big parenting fail.
I tell myself this is because my primary role is as stay-at-home-mum to them, my main job as it were is to be their companion, their playmate, to just ... hang out and be there.
But this is the same reason I often resent them for it.

I am here for them so much of the time. Shouldn't I be like that TV that's always on, you know, the one which theoretically is eventually completely ignored? I envy that TV.
Bet that TV doesn't feel bad about feeling resentful that it's always on.

I know kids have to 'learn' to play by themselves, to create their own entertainment. My girls don't have any problems with that, they just want me to be part of the games they create.
I should feel flattered right?

So why do I feel guilty saying no? And then exasperated when I don't? And then guilty for feeling exasperated?

Oh riiiiight, because I'm a p-a-r-e-n-t. It all goes with the territory.
Joy.

the (p)rice of peace

I thought the 5 minutes peace was too good to be true.

Turns out I was right.

The upside? Picking it up grain for grain kept her occupied for another 5 minutes at least.

Have a great weekend y'all!

the barnyard, tokai

UPDATE: Dec 2011 - It burnt down! Swak!

Sometimes you just want an outing which is low-parental-impact. Sometimes on a Thursday afternoon you just want to sit down, have a coffee and a chat with a mate, and let the kids run free a bit. Sometimes you want this badly enough that you'll settle for a pretty mediocre cup of coffee in fairly dingy surroundings.
The Barnyard in Tokai is perfect for all the above.
Added bonus: the kids love it and won't realise you've actually come here for your own selfish reasons.

For the very smalls there's a huge shady sandpit, rather treacherously scattered with broken plastic toys (maybe bring your own?) but any kiddies up and walking will probably be far more interested in feeding the assorted birds (you can buy small bags of bird feed from the restaurant) ...

... getting up close and personal with an array of farm animals (Sunday's wondering what it would take to catch that turkey) ...

... taking a pony ride, or a couple of turns on the rather decrepit looking merry-go-round.

The day we were there it was fairly quiet, the coffee was pretty weak, the service left a lot to be desired, the tables were sticky. But the staff operating the rides and caring after the animals were friendly and warm, and we discovered one gets a mountain of hot chips with your toasted sandwich.

And the chance to see a wide variety of farm animals this close to Cape Town?

 

Seems it blew her hair back forward, and that's all that really counts right?

That and the (relatively) uninterrupted catch-up my friend and I had! I love the Barnyard!

with apologies to Nick Cave

This is one of the girl's favourite You Tube videos at the mo. The Sydney Opera House reinterprets Nick Cave's The Ship Song. Very beautiful.

However when I had a juice-bottle toting toddler crawling all over me in bed yesterday while I tried to lie perfectly still to stave off cramps and nausea (a 24h bug NOT what I'm sure you're all thinking right now), I rewrote the song to give it more relevance to my life right now.

"Come spill your juice around me,

And let your crumbs rain down.

You are a little sticky to me,

Every time you come around."

baby products - how not to use them

True stories all.

When Friday was just over a year old I managed to lose a small tube of Teejel in her nappy. The child whinged for hours while I got increasingly impatient with her, finally finding the hard metal tube wedged between her soft 'n downy buttocks at the next change.
Bad mother.

A friend stopped up the leaks in her aged VW Beetle for one whole winter using disposable nappies. Using the cheapest brand on the market was less expensive than the repair work would've been.
A good idea once she figured out (as every mother does) that if you don't change the nappies frequently enough they split, filling (in this case her car), with those revolting little gel balls ....
Resourceful mother.

The other night, in hurried end-of-day meltdown avoidance, I liberally squeezed Fissan Paste onto Friday's toothbrush and started brushing. Have you ever had zinc coat the roof of your mouth? Judging by her facial expression it's not very nice.
Distracted mother.

Baby products - really only to be used as per insert instructions.

C'mon, 'fess up - have you ever done anything this stupid funny?