The 5 year old approach.
1. Scan immediate area for possible candidates. Remain alert at all times.
The beach, playground, open field next to your house - all of these are places which could produce your next BFF. Stay attune to the sounds of young voices at play, or even shrieking at their parents - both are signs of possible compatibility.
2. Approach with subtlety, and zero fear of rejection. There are various methods.
Start mimicking the existing game, whether it be jumping over waves and screeching, or quietly collecting daisy petals. Continue until your presence is noticed.
Another tactic is to engage the subject's younger/older sibling in a game. But never lose sight of the real prize, no matter how fun the game at hand, keep an eye on your chosen candidate, you're winning when they start looking sour.
3. Swoop in.
'Come help me get the ball away from your brother.'
WINNER. I could not be prouder of her subtle and devious tactics.
'Here's an interesting shell, would you like it for your collection?'
Another goodie.
'Whaaaa, I just farted and fell over in the water!'
Not as impressive, to me, but the target is now putty in her hands - entranced and utterly hooked.
4. Play like you've known each other forever.
Fairy garden fairy garden fairy garden princess dress pirate capture feed ducks shark attack harass younger siblings sand castle fairy garden here comes the bride cast some spells fairy garden dragon fireman fart daisy chain fairy garden.
5. Keep 'em keen.
Ask, after an hour's play, 'What's your name again?'
Come home deeply satisfied with peer encounter and secure in the knowledge that you've cemented your presence in the world just a little bit more.
Ah, that making friends remained this easy. And simple!
Living and parenting on the edge. Of Africa.
Showing posts with label lists of 5. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lists of 5. Show all posts
Tuesday, 16 October 2012
Tuesday, 10 July 2012
sensory memories
If it wasn't for them I don't think I'd ever have taken the time to remember ...
... the spongy metallic taste of the underneath of my tooth, straining from its socket on one last thread as my tongue teases it and teases it, just stopping short as I wince at the imagined pain. Until one day I don't and suddenly hold my tooth in my hand.
... the exact texture required to drip drip drip wet beach sand into stalagmite towers of unbelievable height and grace on the side of the lagoon. The distinct satisfaction of building one higher than youropponent younger sibling.
... the hot flash of humiliation when you realise that an action or word intended in jest was simply not funny, and in fact hurtful to someone you love. Not to say we ever stop doing this, but the blade of humiliation seems to become duller with age, as you learn to temper it by convincing yourself of the other party's contribution - only children are honest enough to carry the burden themselves.
... how still the still is when you live in perpetual motion. As an adult I can be completely silent in my head while frantically busy with my hands, I can lie perfectly still whilst churning up inside. But now I remember the stillness of a child lying on hot paving next to a pool - hearing nothing but breath, feeling nothing but heartbeat and drying skin, watching the world through wet eyelashes.
... the abandon, the absorption, the anger, the apoplexies of laughter - living it all completely and without question.
I'm listing this one under 'benefits'.
... the spongy metallic taste of the underneath of my tooth, straining from its socket on one last thread as my tongue teases it and teases it, just stopping short as I wince at the imagined pain. Until one day I don't and suddenly hold my tooth in my hand.
... the exact texture required to drip drip drip wet beach sand into stalagmite towers of unbelievable height and grace on the side of the lagoon. The distinct satisfaction of building one higher than your
... the hot flash of humiliation when you realise that an action or word intended in jest was simply not funny, and in fact hurtful to someone you love. Not to say we ever stop doing this, but the blade of humiliation seems to become duller with age, as you learn to temper it by convincing yourself of the other party's contribution - only children are honest enough to carry the burden themselves.
... how still the still is when you live in perpetual motion. As an adult I can be completely silent in my head while frantically busy with my hands, I can lie perfectly still whilst churning up inside. But now I remember the stillness of a child lying on hot paving next to a pool - hearing nothing but breath, feeling nothing but heartbeat and drying skin, watching the world through wet eyelashes.
... the abandon, the absorption, the anger, the apoplexies of laughter - living it all completely and without question.
I'm listing this one under 'benefits'.
Thursday, 15 December 2011
5 underappreciated milestones
The first tooth. First mush. First step. First word. They get all the attention.
But let's take a moment for those less glamorous but, in my view, as exciting milestones. Some of those precious developments which show our little darlene's are growing up and, more joyfully, make our lives just that little bit easier ...
1. The moment they start getting the concept of 'in a minute'.
2. The first time they walk from the car into the house themselves, freeing up our hands for The Bag, the shopping, the keys, the takeaway coffee.
3. The first time they understand, and obey, 'Fetch the wet wipes.'
4. Ditching the toddler car seat and its infernally complex and curse-inducing straps and clasps. All hail the booster seat!
5. The first time they can pick up dog poo unassisted.
Okay, I've yet to experience that last one but lemme tell you - it can't come round soon enough.
But let's take a moment for those less glamorous but, in my view, as exciting milestones. Some of those precious developments which show our little darlene's are growing up and, more joyfully, make our lives just that little bit easier ...
1. The moment they start getting the concept of 'in a minute'.
2. The first time they walk from the car into the house themselves, freeing up our hands for The Bag, the shopping, the keys, the takeaway coffee.
3. The first time they understand, and obey, 'Fetch the wet wipes.'
4. Ditching the toddler car seat and its infernally complex and curse-inducing straps and clasps. All hail the booster seat!
5. The first time they can pick up dog poo unassisted.
Okay, I've yet to experience that last one but lemme tell you - it can't come round soon enough.
Friday, 26 August 2011
the best thing(s) about a childfree morning ...
... jaywalking.
... talking aloud without having to explain myself.
(mumble) 'Damn, I should've turned there.'
'What did you say Mum?'
(slightly louder) 'I said I should've turned there but it doesn't matter, I'll take the next one.'
'The next what Mum?'
'The next turn.'
'This one Mum?'
(deep breath) 'No, the next one coming up.' (mumble) 'Damn, that's a one-way'
'What's a one-way Mum?'
(little exasperated) 'Um, I can't explain right now sweetie, could we just not talk while I work out where I'm going?'
(small pause) 'Are we lost Mum?'
You get what I mean?
... eating chocolate for breakfast. And not having to share it.
... not carrying wet wipes (though this can sometimes be a disadvantage).
... listening to Dr Eve on 567 CapeTalk.
... talking aloud without having to explain myself.
(mumble) 'Damn, I should've turned there.'
'What did you say Mum?'
(slightly louder) 'I said I should've turned there but it doesn't matter, I'll take the next one.'
'The next what Mum?'
'The next turn.'
'This one Mum?'
(deep breath) 'No, the next one coming up.' (mumble) 'Damn, that's a one-way'
'What's a one-way Mum?'
(little exasperated) 'Um, I can't explain right now sweetie, could we just not talk while I work out where I'm going?'
(small pause) 'Are we lost Mum?'
You get what I mean?
... eating chocolate for breakfast. And not having to share it.
... not carrying wet wipes (though this can sometimes be a disadvantage).
... listening to Dr Eve on 567 CapeTalk.
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