The Magic Forest.
From the signs you'd think it was the most exciting part of the whole place. Your curiosity well piqued you thank your lucky stars you're not in a school group, make sure the toddler's sturdily strapped into her stroller, take the eldest firmly by the hand and push through the gate.
More promising signs of
And then, amongst the well-tended jungly pathways and the spine-tingling mossy gloom, you start encountering these ...
... no birds, no animals, the occasional ill-placed turd and more of these ...
... and sorry wtf is that?
It's uncannily like our lounge-room when the house still belonged to its previous owner, a 70+ yo pensioner with a penchant for hideous knick-knacks and the artful arranging thereof.
I need this one explained to me. I really, really do. Magic Forest of ultimate weirdness.